comic relief or worry wart?

Late night tonight. Aero did not shut his eyes to dreamland until 9 pm. That is super late for him as he usually retires around 7 pm.  We went for a late afternoon walk and he slept in his ergo carrier with his sweet head against my chest for about an hour. Oops. Late nap = late to bed.

So, that means mommas bedtime will be around midnight. This is why, I have to feed him every half hour after he goes to sleep. Aero does not tolerate large volumes of breast milk via his G.I. tube. He will vomit. In trying to convert Aero to an oral feeder, vomiting is not an experience I want him to have. It would create negative association with oral experiences. Therefore, I do everything I can to mitigate emesis (fancy medical term for vomit, sounds nicer, doesn't it?) If that means feeding him small volume during the day, every three hours, I do it. If that means making up those lost calories at night by feeding him even smaller volumes very frequently, I do it.

Mr. Wiggle Squiggle Worm wore me down tonight with his antics and acrobatics. I had planned to just let him be comic relief and post this video of him reacting to various homemade percussion shakers (dried beans in a empty yogurt cup, ice cream container, etc). He has a very primal reaction whenever I play with them. If he is laying on his back, his eyes get wide, he grins and start to flail his arms and pump his legs. It's cute, funny, a baby Aero disco dance.

 I loaded the video onto my desktop and took a look at it before posting it. It starts out funny and then creates some anxiety-worry for me. At first I think he is just making funny faces. But, one of the faces almost seems strained. I am wondering if he may be experiencing a series of small seizures?

I know, I know...worry wart momma. I admit it. I live in a state of 'other shoe dropping'. Thankfully, it has dissipated somewhat with more time away from the hospital. Yet, it is still a part of me. And, it is my job. I signed up to be Aero's vigilante advocate and I need to question things that might normally be labeled as 'ah, it's nothing'. I will add it to the 9 month check up list.